While lounging poolside, Dr. Sparrow noticed something curious—squirrels trotting by, never once diving into the pool or lighting up a cigarette.

“They’re reading the signs!” came a gasp, then a rush back into the lab.

Peaceful negotiations followed, resulting in a patented long-term agreement: squirrels would steer clear of registered bird feeders in exchange for a steady supply of walnuts.

Each paid registration includes a free ornament* to post notice of your feeder’s membership.

*Active Ingredient: 100% natural 8-methyl-N-vanillyl-6-nonenamide